Now that summer is here, we don't miss a chance to be outdoors instead of being home. We play outside, 'home'-school outside, and eat outside. I am thankful I can't really work outside - my work is tied to the computer except for actual photo sessions that I do outdoors while kids are with grandma. It really limits my work time, but I'm thankful for that.
It means that every time I'm outside with kids, I'm really there, all of me. It means my work is more focused and I have to learn to say 'no' to Facebook and Pinterest. It means I can chase them around the playground until I have to stop and catch my breath. It means I stop wasting my time and put myself into every task wholeheartedly (always working on that one). It reminds me time is limited. It reminds me that even though nothing is perfect and I don't have all things figured out, my time with the kids is way more important than work. Even though it's work I truly love. Even though it's work that's been built on years of trial and error, sweat and tears, countless unpaid learning hours, webinars, and mentoring sessions.
I may never become a world renowned photographer. My photos may never appear in Bride magazine. I may never shoot 40 weddings a year and don't intend to. But I know my kids, especially at this age, need my presence, undivided attention, and guidance as they slowly learn what life is about, what matters, what's more important than test scores, college admissions, or a career.
It's a little alarming I'm raising them in a world where very few people do what they love. Very few make their passion their career. Not that people don't want to. It's just that they are hindered from doing that the moment they first step foot into public school, where test scores trump discovering your passions and talents. At least that's the impression I got in my 12 years of schooling.
I don't have a formula for raising great kids, finding balance for life and work, helping kids find their life compass. I'm just learning as I go. If there is one skill that's great for a mom and entrepreneur to have, that's being a quick learner. Everything about motherhood is a learning curve. Breastfeeding, nap schedules, balancing career and kids, your relationship with your spouse, even understanding your own feelings about all the constant changes kids bring into your life.
Nothing is perfect right now. I don't think anything in life can be. There is always room for improvement in work, marriage, raising kids, keeping a household. To me, life is one huge transition, it doesn't feel permanent, it passes by quickly. People come and go. I don't want to live pretending I have many more years with my kids, we truly don't know.
So that's that. Amidst constant change, these little picnics and outings with my two little birds. Savoring each moment.
Disclaimer: Thanks to Stonyfield for providing yogurt goodies for kids and I to enjoy at our picnic!
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