Sometimes things don't go as planned. I decided to share this today not to complain, but for my readers to see that I'm just a real mom with really trying days, just like you! Not every day here is filled with picture perfect photo ops, glorious day trips, and delicious recipe creation. Some days are downright brutal. Parenting reality. So here is today...
My neighbor sees my mom taking the kids outside this evening and thinks "Well it must be nice to have grandma come over and watch the kids!"
What she doesn't see:
Baby T has been coughing for over a week, concerned, I took him to the doctor today. We don't settle for just any doctor, so I had to drive one hour each way to see ours. On the way back I stop for gas, while Baby T cries hysterically because he sees me outside and he is inside the car. [Sigh.]
He woke up two hours earlier than usual. Which means I had somewhere between three and four hours of sleep. That's after a stressful evening/night of working in my home office to meet a couple of deadlines. Ever since he woke up all he wants is to be with me, for me to hold him (all 23 pounds of him), to carry him places, and never stay in one spot for more than 60 seconds. Oh, and nurse every five minutes.
His stubborn self has been even more so today. I've lost count of the tantrums this fine Tuesday.
He didn't let me eat dinner. When he isn't feeling well, his happiness is a priority over my hunger, I didn't feel like sending him into another tantrum because he needed to go upstairs right that second. I finished dinner at 10:30 pm after the kids were in bed.
Grandma arrived a couple of hours later than anticipated, but I was thankful because I was ready to call the crazy house to take me. Baby T screaming in the middle of another upsetting fit as she enters the house. He is excited to go outside in the stroller.
Baby E on the other hand is shivering and says she is cold, which I thought nothing of at that time. She wanted to stay home, completely not like her. She breathes outdoors.
While Baby T was outside with grandma, Baby E came home and said she is too cold to be outside. I made her hot tea. Then scrambled to vacuum the house - in the middle of which Baby T came home and all he wanted was to be in my arms. So I finished vacuuming with him in my arms. Then made him watch cartoons with grandma just so I can change the sheets on the beds (one of which he puked on this morning).
It took an hour longer to put Baby T to bed today. That's because he fell asleep in the stroller outside - just an hour before his bedtime.
Dearest daughter Baby E has been pushing all my buttons today, unusual. "No, I don't want this for breakfast." She has been really cranky. Surprise, as I'm putting her to bed after she fell asleep on the couch (which never happens), I feel that she is burning hot. Checking the temperature, fever of 102.0. A great way to finish of the night with one more round of anything I can gather from our remedy cabinet.
* * *
Thankfully not every day is like this. Thankfully my kids are mostly very healthy, we went through the whole winter with maybe one cold! I'm thankful Baby E is old enough to sit and draw for an hour by herself while I tend to her sick brother and try to at least attempt a semblance of 'clean' in the house with him in my arms.
I am so thankful to be able to stay home with them, to have my own schedule where I can revolve around them when they are sick and really need me. So thankful for working from home, contributing financially, and still spending every day with the kids. Thankful for hubby who made sandwiches today, since I haven't had time to make anything.
Staying home and working from home is nothing short of exhausting, but still worth every minute.
Can anyone tell me when they are old enough to fix their own lunch, take their own remedy, and carry themselves upstairs without needing mommy? I know I'll miss them being little, but I will not miss days like this!
How do you stay sane on really hard days with sick kids?
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I will not miss those days, i know it will be a long time before that happens. I have 14 year old brother who is asking to make this and that. Hubby who is grown up but will never take anything unless i give him and will never make himself anything but rather go and buy something already made. Something tells me mom's days are never over.
ReplyDelete:) Yes, looks like it will last pretty much forever. But at least it is a little easier when the kids are older. Who knows, maybe one of your kids will be a chef? ;)
DeleteI feel for you!! Sick and cranky kiddos are never fun. And thank you for sharing- it makes me feel a bit more human to know I'm not the only one who has days like this. Hope the family feels better and this next week is a better one!
ReplyDeleteThank you Keara! I sure hope so too :)
DeleteUmmm never. I saw one of those little cartoons that said: Woke up and waiting for my mom to bring breakfast only to realize that I'm the mom. So basically, once they have their own family. But you still come to your mother to feel the comfort again, right?
ReplyDeleteI remember seeing that one too! I have to admit I like being catered to when visiting mom :) But I certainly have no trouble doing all the work for my own family, cooking from scratch and all (except when it's so hot and we resort to salads and sandwiches).
DeleteBTW, please feel better.Wishing you all strength you could get. It'll pass.
ReplyDeleteOh, we're a lot better already, thank you!
DeleteSorry for your crazy day. By now I hope everyone is better. Definitely I have crazy days too, but mine consist of mostly sharing issues and disagreements between 4 siblings. But I was thinking if there is such a thing as too much attachment? May be since you used to wear him in sling all the time he has a harder time separating? May be nurturing some independence from you could help in the future, like bonding with dad, staying at grandma's (my kids did that after 2 years old). Basically the baby relies on you for soothing, so increasing soothing options may help, like designating a favorite soft animal or a favorite blanket.
ReplyDeleteI couldn't give all my 4 kids lots of attention, so they had to learn other ways.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts sis! Oh I can only imagine! I sometimes have a hard time just keeping the two of them from fighting and teaching them to share, I can't imagine 4 and all boys. Constant bickering, how do you deal with it?!
DeleteA day like that above is very rare and Baby T's extreme 'clingyness' was due to him being sick, which makes sense. I think there is nothing wrong with kids being attached to their primary caregiver through toddlerhood. Yes, I'm looking forward to him staying with grandma when he is done nursing (or at least when he doesn't need me to fall asleep), but I don't want to force it before the child is ready, doesn't feel right. We are also definitely doing more 'being with dad' now that he is older. Up until now it was hard for hubby, he doesn't deal well with babies who can't communicate - but it's getting a lot easier as he is growing.
I also don't want to attach soothing and emotion to an object. People need people. Kids need their parents. I don't really want to instill a habit of relying on things to soothe oneself, you know what I mean? I would rather him rely on a person and learn to communicate his emotions. As adults I think it doesn't benefit us to rely on things to soothe instead of people (i.e. drugs, internet, alcohol, etc)
In my head I tend to think that it's odd that once our babies are born we try to push independence in all aspects of their life and then they hit the teenage years and we wonder why they are so distant from us. I would rather them be close, nurturing relationships, depending on each other, so that when they are older home is a safe haven for them in this crazy world. I don't want to push them out of the nest before they are ready and for me that starts now, when they are just toddlers. :)